A weird night all round...

OK so yesterday evening was just plain strange. We didn't go to bed untilt he early hours of the morning as John has holiday at the moment. I went to bed first and read my book for a bit (Terry Jones Barbarians, in case you are interested which is very good) and John stayed downstairs reading and watching TV for a while. Eventually I yelled down the stairs threatening him with nasty things if he didn't come to bed and, after popping the dogs to bed, up he trudged. I waited while he pootled round in the bathroom etc. and then he ambled in and said "I just saw a ghost".

I was a bit taken aback at this for two reasons - firstly neither him nor I believe in such things (though I will be damned if I will walk through a graveyard at night) and secondly, I was expecting him to moan about being made to come to bed. So this is what he told me...

He was coming up the stairs to bed and saw something move in the bathroom, heading behid the door. He thought it was he hiding waiting to jump out on him (something that I am known to do at regular intervals) and so when he got to the door he said "HA" and pushed it back hard to squish me. At that moment the resistance gave way and the door banged against the wall. The resistance had been created by the stool that we keep in the bathroom and it had popped out from behind the door when he pressed harder. John was convinced that he saw something in the bathroom before he got to the door though.

Of course this morning in the cold light of day he insists that he never thought it was a ghost and he is likely right as behind our house there is a street light which shines through the trees and so casts shadows into the bathroom and it is most likely that was the movement and the increased pressure on the door popped the stool out. Also, this is upstairs in a relatively newish house which, to my knowledge, has never had any deaths in it (unless Iain and Michelle next door need to come clean to us) that is sited on land that (again to my knowledge) was part of a large estate which hasn't been built on before, which was not a cemetery or in any way hauntable (except maybe by the spirits of squirrels). This however did not stop me sleeping with the duvet tucked right up round my ears though...

... and this leads on to the second werid things of the evening. Due to being WAY too hot while I was sleeping, I had the weridest, most vivid dream.
It started that Mum, Dad, my sister, my fiance (who was a man I didn't know) and I were doing a fete stall so we turned up at a big hall with our stuff and on the wall was a diagram saying the position of each stall. However, our stall isn't on there and, when we find the organisers they say if we aren't on the diagram we will have to set up in the garden. So we go out in the garden and it turns out to be my Mum's garden and we start to set up our stall. Sherbert is there but he is tiny, the size of a cat, and curled up in a ball like a fox. And while we are setting up a big, bullet-headed man comes over and starts hassling my sister, the whole tap rapping instead of talking. Eventually he starts to slap her around so I step in and start to fight this man and he is rapping the whole time. I then, during a pause in the fighting, and compliment him on his rapping, telling he should be doing it professionally cos he is really good (I don't remember if he was any good or if I just was trying to appease him). With that he says "Do you really think so? Right you are going to marry me" and grabs me and marches me off across the fields and a river to a train station (none of which are near my Mum's actual garden) and my fiance follows. We get on the train and the carriages were only seperated by curtains.

Now the man is making polite conversation and I am going along with it, trying to keep him happy and each time I annoy him for whatever reason he slaps me. My fiance put his head through the curtain and mouths at me to run and he will stop the man holding me. But it doesn't work, my fiance is a bit useless and misses and the man grabs me and ties me up then goes into the next carriage and kills my fiance.

We are going through amazing scenery with lots of people around us -sometimes we are going past a giant mine with lots of people working it by hand and there are lots of people around and I think they were slaves but I don't know how I knew this. I knelt up on the seat to better look at the scenery. As I do I realise that an asian woman and her daughter are in the seat in front of us and I lean over and start tracing letters out on my hand asking for help. The asian woman is sypathetic but doesn't seem to realise that if she talks the man could hear here so I keep on having to shush her up. She leaves the carriage to phone the police (for some reason the cutains are soundproof) and the mans phone rings. It is his pysciatrist and he talks to him for a while and then hands the phone to me saying he needs to talk to me. The pysciatrist is a recorded message repeating things with very little meaning and there is no sense to what he says and he hangs up mid sentence.

The asian woman then returns and asks what the pscaitrist had said and also lets me know that the poice will be waiting at the station. The station we are going to is called the pier and it is in the middle of shops. As we pull up, there is a kind of cut scene and suddenly I am in a room that is dark with electricity arcing and a contraption which is loads of thick wires that plug into the back of one a mans skull. He disconnects it and I suddenly realise that there are eight people in the room, all dresses like Switch from the matrix but with fur coats. There are 4 in white, 4 in black and each member of the black team is a clone of their corresponding member in the white team. The fourth member of each team is like a living, organic version of the anubis guards from stargate. The leader of the troup grabs a tablet from the machine and swallows it, saying that he now knows the plan - they are to approach the train and let the man holding me see that they are coming, he will react violently and in the firefight this will give them a chance to kill me.

I am then back on the train, but I have changed - I have red frizzy hair and makeup like Pris from Blade runner (do you think I watch way to much science fiction?!) and in a white PVC raincoat which came down to mid thigh and red high heels. We are getting off the train and I see the people walking towards us through the crowd and all hell breaks loose when my captor sees them. I manage to get behind a pillar and then sneak off while they are dealling with him - I am almost past them when they spot and surround me. I suddenly have two machine guns and I spin round in a circle shooting them. Two are too fast and dash off to make a sandwich and then come back (while I am still shooting) and kick my leg (I don't know why I am standing on one leg) causing me to bite on the wodden dowel that I suddenly have in my mouth. I swallow a chunk of it and they laugh saying that it will sufocate and their work is done and they leave.

I crawl away through the shopping center and into the Royal College of Surgeons. There are hundreds of doctors dressed in period dress sat on really long pews in a huge cathedral like room. Stephen Fry runs up and says, "Oh my dear, what have you done?" I tell him what happened and that I am sufocating and ask if he can heal me but he declines to help saying he isn't a doctor. Then Peter Davidson comes dashing round the edge of a pew and, once he is filled in, tells me to lay down on the pew and he will help. He then tries to put me under anethestic by hitting me on the head with a walking stick but Stephen stops him and suggests hypnotism. So I am wake and aware but not feeling pain when he removes the wooden dowel. He then checks me over and finds I have a cracked skull so cuts open my scalp and pops a bit of metal that was in his pocket in to reinforce it. He then sews me up which for some reason makes my hair longer.

As I am coming back to full awareness another doctor wanders up and says that she has called my captors psyciatrist to let him know that I am there. I scream at here and tell everyone to leave because they will be coming to kill me and them and then...

... John nudges me to tell me to wake up.

Bleeding annoying as I would love to know what was going to happen!